Are You Sure About This?

Greetings,
I hope you are doing well.

This article is about the tap on the shoulder, from our own mind, uttering the words, “Are you sure about this?” A point of doubt that questions all you think about yourself and brings about this simple question again: “Are you sure about this?”

This question slowly evolves and adapts to all the dark corners of our mind until you lose a sense of surety in who you are. It slowly overtakes the concept that I struggle with almost every day: you become an imposter, and every action you take feels sus.

Introduction

Imposter syndrome can be defined as a psychological phenomenon where individuals doubt their abilities and accomplishments, fearing they’ll be exposed as frauds despite evidence of their competence. It manifests as self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy.

Aside from the consistent anxiety and stress that individuals bear, in my experience, the worst result is inaction.

Anxiety and stress can cause distress and bring their fair share of troubles. But the advantage, if any, is that it manifests — it’s visible. You can often tell if someone is anxious or stressed, whether it’s them or someone close to them.

Inaction, however, is the silent disaster. It can quietly take over your life and, if not noticed, slowly become the behavior that chokes out growth.

“Even doing nothing is an activity.”

Inaction is the consistent decision to avoid action, which becomes a habit, and then a way of life.

The reason I mention inaction frequently is because it is my current struggle. I’ve had my era of anxiety and stress, and then I’ve had moments of calling everything lucky, undervaluing achievements, and fearing exposure.

In my experience, inaction is not just a symptom — it’s the result of giving in. It’s when you stop struggling and surrender to the doubt. You put your hands up and say, “Alright, I get it. I’ll stay low from now on.”

Understanding Imposter Syndrome

So, reading through all that, are you wondering if you might be struggling with imposter syndrome?

It’s important to realize that it’s not a diagnosable mental disorder, but an evidence-based behavioral pattern. And that means there’s hope — because there’s evidence, and with the right approach, it’s something you can manage.

Imposter syndrome is the darker side of what if?, layered with are you sure about this? — turning into a flurry of self-doubt and inadequacy.

But the core of imposter syndrome isn’t just self-doubt. It’s this:

“What if other people figure it out?”

Maybe you can push through self-doubt and inadequacy on your own. Maybe with support. But when your fear is being found out by others, you try to hide. You still want to do things — you just don’t want anyone to see.

In a world obsessed with sharing and showcasing, that fear becomes a form of torture. You walk forward, head down, hoping no one notices you.

Inaction.

It affects every space where people exist — and today, that’s everywhere. Even the most isolated work often requires collaboration. And while that’s fine for most, for someone with imposter syndrome, it’s a constant anxiety, no matter how well the task is completed.

Eventually, after hearing “Are you sure about this?” a thousand times, you silently reply “No.”
You give up on thriving.
You do the bare minimum to survive.
You wake up to sleep, dream of change, and wake up unchanged.

Triggers and Roots

As previously mentioned, imposter syndrome is a behavioral pattern. While its root may stem from deeper mental health challenges, the pattern itself is built over time.

It’s like a weed that creeps through the cracks of your experiences, watered by moments of doubt and fed by unrealistic expectations — from yourself, or others.

• Culturally, we’re taught to measure worth through external validation — praise, promotions, likes.
• Socially, we’re surrounded by highlight reels, while we sit with our unfiltered selves.
• Psychologically, it could stem from perfectionism, fear of failure, or childhood messages tying love to success.

For me, it’s a cocktail of all three:

• A need to prove myself
• A fear of being found out
• And a quiet voice whispering, “You’ll never be enough.”

The triggers? They’re everywhere:

• A colleague’s offhand remark
• A success dismissed as luck
• A moment of comparison with someone who “has it all together”

These spark the “what if”, which fans into “they’ll figure me out.”
Eventually, you stop trying.
You dodge risks.
You shrink from opportunity.
And inaction takes the wheel.

The Role of Inaction

Inaction is the quiet killer of potential.

It’s not loud like anxiety or dramatic like stress. It’s a slow fade. A surrender.

I’ve sat at my desk staring at a project I know I can do — then that voice: “Are you sure about this?”
And I close the tab.
Tell myself I’ll do it later.
Let the day slip by.

Inaction feels safe.
There’s no risk in doing nothing.
No exposure. No failure.

But that safety is a trap.

I once skipped applying for a role I was qualified for, convinced I wasn’t good enough. Someone else got it. I sat wondering what could’ve been.

Inaction doesn’t just stall progress. It chokes out the chance to prove yourself wrong.

It’s waking up to the same day, over and over again.

Strategies to Overcome or Manage

Here’s the light:
Because imposter syndrome is a pattern, you can chip away at it.

It’s not about removing doubt — it’s about moving anyway.

For me, it started with small steps:

• Write one paragraph
• Send one email
• Post one thought

Something so small it felt silly to doubt.

But I did it.
And each time, it was a quiet yes to that internal “are you sure?”

Try this:

• Keep a record of what you’ve done well.
• Not big wins — small ones.
• A thank-you note, a finished task, a compliment from someone.

When the doubt hits — pull that record out.
It’s evidence. Not luck.

Another trick: talk to someone you trust.
I once told a friend I felt like a fraud. She laughed — not at me, but at the idea I’d fooled her all these years.

Sometimes, you need that voice from outside the spiral.

Mentally, reframe the “what if”:

What if they find out I’m not perfect?
→ What if they don’t care?
→ What if I’m enough as I am?

It’s not a cure, but it’s a crack in the wall.
And that’s all you need to start moving.

When to Seek Help

There’s a point where the weight gets too heavy to carry alone.

If inaction becomes your default,
If “are you sure” drowns everything else,
If you’re not just doubting but drowning—
That’s when self-help might not be enough.

I hit that wall once. Even small steps felt impossible.
Talking to a therapist helped untangle the mess.

There’s no shame in it.
Therapists help you spot what you’re too close to see.
If the spiral’s too tight, reach out.

It’s not weakness.
It’s choosing not to let the imposter win.

Conclusion

Imposter syndrome is that tap on the shoulder, that whisper:

“Are you sure about this?”

It’s real. It’s heavy. I wrestle with it more than I’d like.
But here’s what I’ve learned:

You don’t have to be sure. You just have to start.

The doubts won’t disappear,
but they don’t have to drive.

Inaction is the real imposter —
masquerading as safety while stealing your shot at something more.

So to you, reading this:
You’re not alone.
You’re not a fake.

Take one small step today.
Let it be your quiet rebellion against the “what if.”

You might not feel sure —
but you’re braver than you think.

Keep going.